Vine Iarna

That's Romanian for "Winter is coming." It turns out that I'm a complete idiot and "Game of Thrones" is actually available here. I had checked before the series started, and HBO's website said it was being broadcast in Romania on Canal+, which is the cable service that we don't have (we have their competitor, RDS). But apparently the show is also being rebroadcast on RDS one day later, which I didn't realize until this week. Big thanks to Ioana, who discovered it. So now I'm watching my new favorite TV show every week. And I can even see the three episodes I missed: Gagi found them on the internet. I am assuming, here, that Gagi is a long-lost brother of series author George Martin, and therefore there aren't any copyright issues to worry about. OK then.

Some of you are thinking, "Wait a second. You have a six-week-old new baby, and a gorgeous wife who just had her first Mother's Day, and the lead story in this blog update is Game of Thrones?"

Yes.

Which is not to take away from the gorgeousness of my wife, or awesomeness of my son, or specialness of the first Mother's Day. It's just that, you know...I'm getting to watch Game of Thrones. OK. I can see I'm not helping.

We did have our first Mother's Day, which went quite well although the in-laws were all confused because Mother's Day (actually, Women's Day) in Romania is on March 8. So they were all like, "Well, that's very nice. A little late, though, yeah?"

The nice thing about being in Romania is that fresh flowers are super-cheap. You can walk along almost any semi-major street in Bucharest and there will be lots of people selling fresh-picked flowers from the countryside for like a dollar a bunch. So you can be a total cheapskate and still seem like an awesome husband on Mother's Day.

Don't tell Io.

I can see I'm not helping again. Did I mention that we got to see the first episode of Game of Thrones that has Hodor in it?

OK.

Scarab beetles at no extra charge!

Someone gave us this outfit for Gabe that makes him wave his hands in the air like he just don't care. It comes with a very saucy matching beret hat, which I'm sure my Frenchy-loving brother would appreciate.

However, we took Gabe out for a walk that day and discovered that the beret, like the Maginot Line, has a key design flaw:

"Who turned out the lights?"

That pales in comparison, though, to the gift at right. It's a wind-up doll that Gabe unfortunately seems to really love. When you wind it up, it sways its lifeless unmoving death-face from side to side like something out of a cheap horror movie and plays the theme song to "It's A Small World" over...and over...and over.

*Shudder*

My feeling is that this is basically a form of child abuse, but all the rest of the folks in the bloc -- people who have clearly never been to Disneyland -- think that this doll is awesome. I remember the last time I went on the "It's A Small World" boat ride, many years ago with my friend Bobbo and his girlfriend. They had never been, and had no idea that this trip up the river was less Tunnel of Love and more Apocalypse Now. As we got towards the end of that Satanic nightmare waterway, suddenly the boats in front of us stopped. We bumped into them, stuck adrift while the shuddering, gibbering mannequins all around us shrieked their banshee wails about how it was a world of tears. Endless minutes passed before we heard a groan from the netherworld and the boats wallowed back into motion. Bobbo clutched my forearm with a grip that could break bones.

"Ryan," he croaked. "It's going backwards."

The Infernal Gate

This week is going to be packed with activity. We are now a scant 90 minutes away from Ioana's exorcism, so that's pretty exciting. Also -- and I don't want to jinx anything by talking too loud -- there may have been some movement on the issue of getting Gabe's birth certificate. Watch this space. We may have it by the end of the week.

And we're getting ready for our out-of-town visitors, and Ioana's in the middle of exams for nursing school, and we're starting to get stuff together for our overnight trip to Sighisoara with Gabriel. Woohoo!

Moment of Zen:

PS GAME OF THRONES!!!!