Keep on Swimming, Keep on Swimming... *

Faithful readers know why.

Dreaded moment came, daddy and his chick had to say goodbye, lions and his owls had to say goodbye, the whole world caved in on us in spite of our best efforts to use ration as a shield. And they told me that "the program policies and foreign relations outweight" THIS. The nerve!

I insisted on taking pictures this morning before departure, in tears and all, because while taking the picture one (me) has the sense of holding on to something. No, it didn't work, the plane still took off. But I'm posting them pictures anyway!

Memories of painful days soon to be over...

I hope one day my son will ask (from the height of his presidential office) "Why was that necessary?", and then maybe the world will change a little bit for the better. Until then that's what he had to say :

"Off with their heads!"

So here we are, all by ourselves, and very very sad, with no blog savvy daddy to report on our daily progress and cuteness. In order to straighten a bit of the harm done, mommy will try to supply the essential news and moves, at least as much as the king related duties will allow ...

So today One man's search becomes officially One woman's search, and I'm afraid Dracula is no longer top of the 'most wanted' list. As you might have noticed in the last three months, this blog is definitely a dedicated Gabriel site. Well done Gabi, down with these occidental myths!

And this is my new office - the computer will keep us in touch, and your spot warm, lions :(

One change that, I'm sure, will not shock anyone is that my hubby's beautiful narratives of exotic flavor, exorcisms and superstitions included, will be replaced by my stammering (is that the right word for Demosthenes's problem?) hasty entries.

Second change will be that I'm going to post waaay more pictures of Gabita cu fundita (formerly Baron von Cute-tail-bow) than his selective daddy did. I'm sure my mother-in-law will think this is a fair trade, and that's all that matters. By the way, thank you for the blankets and onezies, grandma, got the package today. Recipes to follow, on this very blog perhaps, since we have more than one chef in the family :)

And here we go now : PICTURES !

And the third change is that I'm going to add to each post an archive picture of

the Chick and his Daddy :

Pre-moment of Zen, that is:

* For the curious this is a Nemo (the cartoon) reference. My friend who got me into it years ago will surely smile. All the way to America and back, several times, my dear Alina!

They'll Learn Much More Than I'll Ever Know

Well, here it is. My last day.

Io and I kept the day free from social obligations so that we could spend all our time together with Gabe. We kept to routine for much of it -- I made breakfast, we went for a walk and shopping at Auchan, we played a lot with Gabe, Io and I played computer games a little when he was napping.

I'd like to take a moment to comment on this onesie, by the way. I'm not sure which of our Romanian friends gave it to us. The picture may be hard to see, but along the top it says "The Legendary Champion," and then underneath it has a picture of a donkey, a bear, and two cows. Okay, first of all, that's four champions, unless they come together into some sort of barnyard Voltron or something. Then in the lower right it says "Team-Dream 5." Look: (A) that is backwards, Romania, and (2) we seem to be getting our numbers confused again.

"There...are...four...lights!"

In between all that stuff, I spent the day packing, checking in for my flight, etc. I leave first thing tomorrow morning. I'm not sure what's going to happen with this blog. Io said she might try to keep up some entries and might post some pictures. I'm turning the keys over to her when I go. We'll see.

It's going to be weird going back. I've never been out of my life for such a long stretch. I haven't used an ATM, driven a car, woken up to an alarm clock, listened to the radio, or sent or received a text message in the last six months. With a couple of rare exceptions, I haven't used a credit card or a telephone.

But more than that, it's just going to be hard to leave. Io and I are really sad. Over the course of this trip, we've both decided that we can't do this again next year, even though the DA's office is willing to give me the time off. It's just too financially irresponsible. We could probably put the money together to do it, but it would drain our savings and probably put us in debt, and with Gabe we need to be saving, not spending. Plus it would mean another six months where I have no health insurance or life insurance. And even though the DA's office said the time off is fine, you never know what they will actually say when you come back. I breathed a sigh of relief the other week when I contacted them and they confirmed that my job is still waiting for me. We've rolled the dice this year and come out okay, but it just wouldn't be smart to double down.

That's a pretty mixed gambling metaphor.

So that means a year apart. I'll come back a couple of times next year for vacations, but they'll be pretty short. It's a hard thing to face, especially since it's all so senseless.

The hardest thing about leaving is leaving Gabe. It's hard to leave Io, but we will keep in touch by Skype and email, and in any case neither one of us is likely to change all that much while we're apart. But Gabe is going to be changing every day, and the only way to be part of it is to be there. Things are going to happen every day that will never happen again and there's no way to catch up on them. I will just miss them. I know that people go through a lot worse. I also know that this will all seem a lot better two weeks from now when we've settled into a new routine and realize that the earth is still turning and so many things in our life our good. But right now, it sucks ass. Leaving Gabe is still sort of inconceivable to me. I have never hated the INS more than at this moment.

It's not that I don't want to be here, Gabe. I want to be here. But this will be better for you. It will mean a house when you're a little older, and better schools. It means health insurance waiting for you when you get to the U.S.

But by God I wish it didn't have to be this way. I love you so much.

I knew a father who had a son.

He longed to tell him all the reasons

for the things he'd done.

He came a long way, just to explain.

He kissed his boy as he lay sleeping

and then he turned around and headed home again.

--Simon & Garfunkel, "Slip Slidin' Away"

I Don't Know Why You Say Goodbye

Time is really drawing to an end. It's difficult to get my head around. Leaving Gabe?

Today I went on my Farewell Tour. It really only had two stops on it, because I don't know many people here and most of them live in the same house with me. First stop was Aunt Reli, who seemed genuinely sad to see me go even though we've only met five or ten times.

In a strange way, I think people see my leaving as a symbol of Gabe leaving. Reli said goodbye to me in a very nice and heartfelt way, and then she went to see Gabe (who was still in his carseat), and started crying. Similarly, at stop #2 (the great-grandparents), the G-G's were sad to see me going, but great-grandma Negru really started getting teary talking about Gabe, how he's going to grow up and they won't see it, and joking that it's okay for me and Io to go but we have to leave Gabe with them. I'm like, He's not going anywhere. This is the whole point, from my perspective.

But I guess my going is sort of making everyone realize that time is passing and soon enough, everything will change. So Reli was pretty emotional about Gabriel, as was great-grandma. Which I think shows that even at just three months old he is a LADY-KILLER.

Just like his dad.

No woman can resist me.

Stop #2, like I sort of already gave away, was the Negrus' place in Rahova. Great-grandpa and great-grandma were very happy to see us, and for once we were going at a time when Tania could go as well, so she got to see her parents. We hung out for a long time enjoying summer on their miniature farm. It was cool to see all the stuff coming in: bunches of grapes are growing on all the vines, figs, cherries, herbs, tomatoes, the whole nine yards. There was lots of conversation, and much attention lavished on Gabe.

A fine time was had by all. It's been really great getting to know great-grandpa and great-grandma during the six months I've been here. Their lives are amazing, and so different from what mine has been like.

After that, we headed home, fed Gabe, and then Io, Tania, Gabe, and Sir Gagi the Gadgetfixer (and I) went out to dinner. This was my thank-you dinner to them for putting up with me all these months. We headed out to Cantina Verde, a nice place that is walking-distance and has a baby-friendly outdoor patio. The weather was perfect and the food was great.

Thanks, in-laws!

It's all difficult, though. It's like, we have this great dinner, and then walking back to the bloc Io and I can't help but think that's the last nice dinner we're going to have together for a long while. It's so nice to go out with your wife and have a good meal outside and then walk home. I will miss it very much.

And that's basically it. I'm here all day tomorrow, but it'll mostly be packing and getting stuff organized and ready for my arrival back in LA, dealing with last-minute laundry and financial stuff, etc. I leave first thing Tuesday morning.

Delicious Frog Doll

Moment of Zen:

My Dog Has No Nose

The last couple of days have been deadly hot. It was nearly a hundred yesterday, with enough humidity that today we're getting crashing thunderstorms. It's times like this that Romania's otherwise-charming superstitious nature becomes less an endearing cultural quirk and more a motive to murder people. Romanians believe that moving air of any kind (what they call "curent") will make you sick. So that means no air conditioning and no fans. If I even bring out a table fan in the living room, Gagi retreats to the bedroom. When I tried to put a fan on Gabe, Tania freaked out and said it could paralyze him. What?!

Gabriel's midnight ride.

(Sarah Palin will tell you all about it)

So tensions were high here for a couple of days, but with today's thunderstorms things have cooled down some, both literally and figuratively.

Otherwise, things in the bloc are moving along like they usually do, but more and more things keep happening for the last time. We had our final ESL class as co-professors. Our students did very well on their final exam, and brought me some lovely parting gifts. I made them metric chip cookies.

U-S-A! U-S-A!

We went out on an exciting adventure the other day to pick up some last few souvenirs and get Gabe out of the stifling heat of the bloc and into the sweltering stench of the outdoors. One thing about Bucharest you won't hear about in tourism books: when it gets really hot and muggy, the city stinks. The stray dogs stink, their poop stinks, the city's makeshift open garbage pits stink. But today's rain should get rid of a lot of that gross crap and deposit it safely in our water table.

Gabriel had a big day today: his first unassisted rollover, from belly to back. Good job Gabe! Next stop: the presidency. My lawyer friends and everyone who watches Fox News are now going, "Um, point of procedure, foreign-born citizens aren't constitutionally eligible to be president." That would be a good point, lawyers and Fox News viewers, except that I was talking about PRESIDENT OF THE EARTH. Anyway, good job Gabriel! (The photo at left is unrelated, lest you think he was cheating. The roll was performed on an empty bed with full scientific controls.)

And now we come to a bold new frontier for this blog, even bolder than predicting the unification of all world governments under my son's steely boot-heel: I am going to try to post a couple of movies of Gabriel. Save them to your hard drive, they will be really valuable someday.

First up, Smile For Dad, shot by me in the Real Hipermart:

I think you can really see my film degree showing there. Notice the rank amateurishness of this next video, shot by Ioana during bathtime:

Did you notice how the focus drifted in and out? Christ. What can you do? Let's leave the movie-making to the experts, honey. Anyway, I wasn't sure whether this sort of thing is supposed to be submitted for an Oscar or an Emmy, so I just sent it in for both, and since I was going to the post office anyway I sent one to the Nobel Committee just for kicks. It's a lot cheaper to mail stuff to Sweden from here than the U.S.

Moment of Zen:

"SWEET JESUS I'M BEING DEVOURED BY A LION!"

Evacuate? In Our Moment Of Triumph?

Another lovely few days in Bucharest. After some delays, we finally had the post-baptism bath. Like many celebrations in Romania, what I was at first led to believe was not a big deal turned out to be a fairly major deal.

We had godparents Cati and Ovi and their daughter Anna, plus great-grandma Gomoiu came over in her Sunday best. There were ritual candles, ritual towels, and the bathwater has to include a bunch of specific items: a feather, a linden flower, something silver, something gold, the parents' wedding rings, something sweet, religious icons, rice, plus anything else meaningful to the family (in our case, Gabriel's rubber ducks).

After that, the godmother gives the new baby his first bath as a saved soul. Gabriel did not seem to appreciate the gravity of the situation and screamed his head off the whole time. Which is weird, because usually he likes baths. Maybe it was the feather.

You'd think he was Paris Hilton stealing a necklace from Lindsay Lohan

after posting a picture of his junk on Twitter

After the bath was over he got dressed in yet another ritually gifted set of clothing from the godparents (another super-cute sailor suit) and we all had cake and little sweet pastries.

We gathered up all the stuff from the bath and then I just about gave Tania a heart attack by trying to dump out the bathwater. Apparently this is very bad luck. The water has to be used to nourish an existing tree.

Gagi said he wanted to crack open our motorized swing to see if he could figure out what was wrong with it. I was like, "Sure, go ahead," knowing that it was useless but figuring it would make him feel good to at least try, since he's an electrical engineering type. I started to get concerned when I noticed Gagi adding bits of scrap wire to the innards of the chair, but when he was done, it turned out that he had actually fixed it. Holy smokes! Thanks Gagi!

King Gabriel is pleased as well, and bestows upon thee a knighthood.

Arise, Sir Gagi, the Gadgetfixer!

That has turned out to be a major bonus, because the swing tends to put Gabe to sleep when he is fussy and tired but won't fall asleep just lying in bed. My God, sir, thank you.

Yesterday we had a big adventure: Io and I went out for an entire afternoon and early evening downtown, taking Gabe along in his carrying pouch. This was our first time really using this thing for any extended length of time, and I have to say that while it looks a little bit unwieldy, it's actually a lot unwieldy. Io tried it on the way back and had an easier time of it since she was pregnant once, but I spent the whole time picturing myself falling down a staircase with Gabe strapped helpless to my chest.

I have to admit, though, that's it's pretty convenient to be able to cart Gabriel around without having to hold onto him, keeping your hands free to rattle rattles, shade Gabe's eyes, wipe his face, hold his hands, you know what I'm not really sure how much we're gaining here. He did sleep through about half of our trip, so during those times I had use of my hands.

We took the subway downtown and walked around quite a bit, mostly picking up souvenirs for people since I'm heading back to LA shortly. If you're reading this blog and don't get a souvenir, don't feel bad. It just means I don't value our friendship.

We also stopped for an ice cream sundae and then had lunch out at what is becoming one of my favorite Bucharest restaurants, The Beer Wagon. We even tried to catch a movie, but there was nothing playing that we wanted to see. It probably would have been crazy anyway.

Our travels took us to a bookstore, because we wanted to get a Romanian cookbook for my chef-in-training brother Greg. I was glad to hit a bookstore, because once I leave Io's Kindle behind I'm going to be pretty much out of books for the flight back. As I was browsing the shelves I came across this prominently displayed historical book about Hitler meeting aliens. As you can see, it's written by a doctor. Unfortunately, my Romanian isn't advanced enough for such a technical work.

After an exciting day and early evening wandering around, we eventually got on the subway back home. Today we went to the doctor for a three-month checkup, and got a clean bill of health. He's gaining weight slower than the chart in the doctor's office indicates, but the doctor said that's fine because the chart is just an average "and anyway, it's French."

Freaking French.

Gabriel's passport and Consular Report of Birth Abroad arrived by courier this week. I've been feeling really bad about going back to LA. It's like, I have to leave now? Just when Gabriel is getting bigger and more interactive and non-colicky? Things are just getting great!

But these documents gave me some perspective. When they arrived I took a quick look at them and then put them away, glad to be able to cross at least one hassle off my list of things I have to keep track of. Tania looked at them when she got home from work and started crying, because to her these represent the fact that Gabe is leaving forever, in a year at most. She's glad he's leaving, and Ioana too for that matter; like all Romanians I've met, she feels like this country is no place to live. But it's still going to be very hard on her.

I try to always remember: as much as this sucks, there are many people in this world -- people who have lost children or spouses, people who want to have kids but can't -- who would change places with me and Io in a second.

Moment of Zen: